Biology and Blathering

And so, as I sit here in my room, on the eve of my final Final, I ponder what has gotten me here. What extra-personal forces have driven me to where I am today, where I've busted my ass to get, and where I bust my ass to keep myself running in place. I know that sounds rather cynical, but bear with the late-night outlook for a moment.

As I ponder the function of micorrhizae, the origins of our ancestry, extremophilic bacteria and the revolutionary Krebs Cycle, I find myself thinking about the people in my life. No, I'm not implying that I know people who help plants grow, or who can survive in otherwise unlivable conditions (though, I know many people who live in dorm rooms), but rather, I focus on the affect these people have had upon me. Their thoughts, affections, insults, impulses and what have you.

Consider how much original thought we can actually attribute to ourselves. Most all that we (I suppose I should speak for myself on this one) use in communication is things that are familiar to us. In biology, this means using a classification system and nomenclature that is widely accepted by the community which uses it. In our personal lives, this means communicating familiar ideas. As arbitrary as that seems of an observation, I feel like I forget that sometimes.

Anyway, I find that I cannot attribute any one thought, feeling or impulse I've ever had to complete and total originality. Any joke is some form of a cultural reference (though, my execution tends to be poor). My political views are vastly influenced by the sociopolitical stimuli that I receive. My affections are poorly hashed together words to describe indescribable feelings to those around me. It frustrates me, that what I think and say are merely reflections of the world around me. I digress.

The point here, I suppose, is that I feel like at some level, I'm not the only one that feels this way. And if that's the case, there are other individuals standing behind those reflections who feel like I do (in some form). I like to think of this as hopeful. Over the years, I've become increasingly grateful to those that have impacted my life, and I am genuinely indebted to all of them. Good or bad memories, the people I've met, those people I've become distant from, people that I've become closer to - they have shaped me into who I am.

And I couldn't thank them enough for it.

~Eric

So after quite some time, I decide to make a return to this blog that I started oh, so long ago. Some time ago, I began this as some sort of mystical musing. Whether I thought people cared, or not, I decided that some whimsical writing was in my future. Future it would be appropriately termed, since the last post is dated in March. Oops.

So, then. What have I learned in the many months since March? I suppose I could formulate a list.

• I am not invincible
• There are limits to what I can do
• Not too many =p
• Hard work yields success
• Success is preceded by distress
• Friends and enemies often walk a blurred line
• I fail at adequately addressing every social situation

This is a very short, incomplete list. I feel like there is a lot of substance that can be spoken for here, and who knows - maybe someday I'll actually examine these further. Maybe I'll even use inductive reasoning to actually generalize these so they could better represent a wider population of people.

As I look again, I can't deem one more important than the other. Which leads me to one conclusion. All things the an individual experiences are life-altering. Each interaction with other people, every mistake, every speed-induced crash into jagged rocks has the potential to shape the course of your life, and more importantly the course of your mind. In my ONLY other blog post (at the writing of this) I speak a lot to introspection. I think a better, more associative word for that is reflection.

So, what? What point is there to this. If I were to name a lesson, more importantly than all things I've learned so far, it would be that reflecting upon successes, failures and works in progress is what makes us grow. As I've gotten older, I've found myself lying down at night to only think about the future, fantasize about what could be. I have also found myself stagnate, get boring for lack of a better term.

So is reflection what keeps us young? Is thinking about what we've done, and examining our experiences holistically the fountain of youth?

I guess it requires some reflection.

~Cheers =)

The Tempest

And so I would have it begin here. Project: Thoughtvault is underway and I should hope that it emulates a tempest. A whirlwind of ideas, emotion, and opinion, designed to spur a downpour of questions and answers.

Looking at that, maybe it will be better if I cut the whimsicality and just start writing.

What's coming to me right now is one word; Introspection. The act of looking inward, at ones self. Actively looking inward at ones self from an objective perspective is relatively difficult. It requires a certain portion of your mind to part your self image from who you actually are. Objectively speaking, it is a difficult process to engage in - because our self image is knit so tightly with who we are. But what good is it to you?

I can't answer that question beyond my own realm of understanding. For me, it has always provided me with a sense of solace. Introspection has provided me with an effective way to examine who I am in all things. The easiest way for me to explain how I do it is by example. For instance, we'll take something as simple as my distaste for peanut butter (a staple sandwich-making item in our society). If I was to view my distaste for peanut butter introspectively, I would follow this pattern of thought. "Why don't I like it?" to which the answer would be something to the effect of taste, which can further be questioned and explained by the quality of its taste, texture etc.
Riveting, I know.

At any rate, this has allowed me, personally, a means by which to rationalize my own feelings. Having said that, it doesn't necessarily fix anything in the short time - but it is nice to be able to do so. It helps in examining others as well. One who better understands themselves can much easier understand another fellow human being.

Which brings me to a more pertinent points. Fellow man. Human beings, man king, humanity. It seems to me, from where I sit, that as human beings our differences only go so deep. At the very core, we all seek some pretty basic things. I'm not saying we all need food, water shelter, that goes without saying under any circumstances. I'm speaking more to our social and emotional desires, which tend to be tied together quite closely. It's not terribly difficult to observe - everyone wants a friend, nobody wants to feel alone, and no one wants to get hurt. To me, these are some pretty profound (yet simple) paradigms for humans as a social animal - which is why I become so perplexed by the desire of some to hurt others. Whether it's personal gain, or just a desire to 'watch the world burn', it's a phenomenon that escapes me. So I guess I pose a question - what is it in someone that would possess them to be malignant towards another person? After all, people are people, right?

I suppose I'll close there, and leave that question open ended. I should hope that you, as a reader, would like to engage in dialogue, however if you do not - then all I ask is that when you walk away, you take with you that question. "What is it in us that ostracizes and degrades others?" At that, I take my leave and take to a new week, and should hope that all is well for those sitting on the other end of this downpour of verbosity.

Take care~